Why validation is so important during tough times

South Australian farmers have been facing dry conditions for over 12 months, with hopes for relief now fading into disappointment and worry.

Almost every agricultural area in the state is experiencing one of the worst years on record.

Earlier forecasts from the Bureau of Meteorology predicted a wet season, prompting croppers to plant full programs in the hope that rain was on the way. However, the rain never came, and even if it does now, it will be too late.

To add to this, widespread frost has further damaged crops and vineyards across the state.

As the harsh reality of drought begins to settle in, it is crucial to focus on validation—at the individual, community, and government levels. But what does validation look like, and why do we need it?

Why we need validation

Validation is essential because it helps us feel less alone in our struggles. It allows us to acknowledge that what we’re experiencing is real and difficult.

It opens the door to kindness, compassion, and acceptance that some things are beyond our control.

As American psychologist Tara Brach says, "Feeling seen and understood is often the very foundation of healing."

Validation makes us feel heard, understood, and less overwhelmed by our emotions.

At its core, validation is about recognising and accepting our emotions and extending that recognition to others. It involves creating space for difficult feelings without judgment, which can be immensely healing.

Validation at the individual level

One of the most important forms of validation is self-validation. This means pausing to acknowledge our own experiences and emotions.

We don’t have to like these feelings, but we can observe them without judgment. For example, simply noticing and naming emotions can be powerful: “Here is anxiety” or “Here is frustration.” It’s also helpful to remind ourselves that "This is hard" and that struggling with these challenges is a shared human experience.

Validation in relationships

During tough times, relationships—whether romantic or within farming families—often bear the strain.

Validation in these relationships means giving full attention to one another, listening without immediately jumping in to fix or offer solutions.

It’s about acknowledging the other person’s experience.

Phrases like "That sounds hard," "I can understand why you feel that way," or "What you’re saying makes sense right now" can be validating.

It’s not about agreeing or offering advice; it’s about recognising and accepting the other person’s emotions and giving them space to feel.

Validation at the societal level

Validation isn’t just important on a personal level; it also matters at a societal and governmental level.

Recognising drought conditions or naming them as such is vital for farmers’ mental health.

Currently, the South Australian government no longer makes official drought declarations, possibly to avoid perceptions of "handouts."

But acknowledging a drought isn't about asking for help—it's about validating the experiences of those affected.

The National Drought Agreement (2024-2029) acknowledges that even the most prepared and resilient farmers may need support at times.

It’s not just about financial aid; it's about recognising the emotional toll that drought takes on farmers and rural communities.

A simple statement from government leaders acknowledging the hardship farmers are facing could make a significant difference.

Validation is something we can control

While we cannot control the weather or government actions, we can practice validation—both for ourselves and others.

Validation means recognising and accepting emotions, making space for them, and allowing them to exist without judgment. In doing so, we foster a sense of connection and understanding during tough times.

Remember: validation is about recognising, not fixing. It’s about seeing how someone is feeling and making room for those emotions to be felt and expressed.

Steph Schmidt is a clinical psychologist, farmer, wife and mum of three young boys who is based on farm at Worlds End, South Australia. Sign up for her Little Rocks Reminders,  weekly emails with tips to stay on track www.stephschmidt.com.au/littlerocks 

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